Episode 51: Sanctuary Trauma – When Support Isn’t Supportive

In this episode, Steve leads the charge to discuss the concept of Sanctuary Trauma:

“Occurs when an individual who suffered a severe stressor next encounters what was expected to be a supportive and protective environment’ and discovers only more trauma.” (Source)


  • Behavioral Addiction (aka Process Addiction): a form of addiction that involves a compulsion to engage in a rewarding non-substance-related behavior – sometimes called a natural reward – despite any negative consequences to the person’s physical, mental, social or financial well-being.
  • Addiction: a neuropsychological disorder characterized by a persistent and intense urge to use a drug or engage in a behaviour that produces natural reward, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences.
  • Physical Dependence: a physical condition caused by chronic use of a tolerance-forming drug, in which abrupt or gradual drug withdrawal causes unpleasant physical symptoms.
  • Psychological Dependency: a cognitive disorder that involves emotional–motivational withdrawal symptoms—e.g. anxiety and anhedonia—upon cessation of prolonged drug abuse or certain repetitive behaviors.
  • Dopamine Dependence
  • Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM): the taxonomic and diagnostic tool published by the American Psychiatric Association (APA).
  • 4 C’s of Addiction: Compulsion, Craving, Consequences, and Control
  • Thinking Fast and Slow – Daniel Kahneman
  • Wechat – Chinese “everything” app where you can do most things you could want to do on your phone
  • Erich Fromm – To Have or to Be?
  • Desire as Lack vs Desire as Fullness: That Dang Dad’s take on it (Transcript; Video)
  • The Fullness of Desire (Essay) by Lida Maxwell
  • Episode 11: Internalized Capitalism
  • Carl Rogers – On Becoming a Person
  • Roy Baumeister and Kathleen D. Vohs – Narcissism is Addiction to Esteem
  • Thomas Joiner – Lonely at the Top
  • Operant Conditioning: a learning process where voluntary behaviors are modified by association with the addition (or removal) of reward or aversive stimuli.
  • (Random) Reinforcement: any consequence that increases the likelihood of an organism’s future behavior whenever that behavior is preceded by a particular antecedent stimulus.


  • Secondary Trauma: can be incurred when an individual is exposed to people who have been traumatized themselves, disturbing descriptions of traumatic events by a survivor, or others inflicting cruelty on one another.
  • Cruel Optimism (Book): A relation of cruel optimism exists when something you desire is actually an obstacle to your flourishing.
  • Hunchback of Notre-Dame: a French Gothic novel by Victor Hugo, published in 1831.
  • Sacred: In Durkheim’s theory, the sacred represents the interests of the group, especially unity, which are embodied in sacred group symbols, or totems. The profane, on the other hand, involve mundane individual concerns.
  • Jonathan Haidt: an American social psychologist, Professor of Ethical Leadership at New York University Stern School of Business, and author. His main areas of study are the psychology of morality and moral emotions.
  • Episode 48: Ressentiment
  • Trauma: an emotional response to a distressing event or series of events.
  • Complex PTSD: a psychological disorder that is theorized to develop in response to exposure to a series of traumatic events in a context in which the individual perceives little or no chance of escape, and particularly where the exposure is prolonged or repetitive.
  • Episode 33: Memes
  • Internal Family Systems Model: combines systems thinking with the view that the mind is made up of relatively discrete subpersonalities, each with its own unique viewpoint and qualities. IFS uses family systems theory to understand how these collections of subpersonalities are organized.
  • Grey Rocking (Informal Psychology): The practice of deliberately making oneself uninteresting and unresponsive so as to defend oneself against a narcissist who wishes to elicit certain responses. 
  • “Hurt people hurt people”
  • Musashi (Book): Japan’s gone with the wind
  • Dragonball Series
  • Fractal: a geometric shape containing detailed structure at arbitrarily small scales, usually having a fractal dimension strictly exceeding the topological dimension.
  • Self-Similarity: a self-similar object is exactly or approximately similar to a part of itself (i.e., the whole has the same shape as one or more of the parts).
  • Chomsky Quote: “That’s the standard technique of privatization: defund, make sure things don’t work, people get angry, you hand it over to private capital.”
  • Anomie: a social condition defined by an uprooting or breakdown of any moral values, standards or guidance for individuals to follow.
  • Episode 42: Decadence
  • Sir John GlubbThe Fate of Empires and Search for Survival
  • Nomological Networks: a representation of the concepts (constructs) of interest in a study, their observable manifestations, and the interrelationships between these.
  • De-escalation: a human behavior that is intended to prevent escalation of conflicts. It may also refer to approaches in conflict resolution. People may become committed to behaviors that tend to escalate conflict, so specific measures must be taken to avoid such escalation.
  • Episode 50: Pain w/Zoe Bee

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